The Real Truth of Esme Parsons

S H A D O W  G O V E R N M E N T
S H A D O W  G O V E R N M E N T

revesdoux:

people i need to be best friends with….peter and ruxin!

rafibomb:

laughterkey:

gtpomella:

laughterkey:

gtpomella:

For years growing up, I used to think that when people would yell or chant “Gattaca”, I thought they were referencing this movie and I never knew why.

Also, I’ve always had rather bad hearing, so I never knew that they were actually screaming or chanting “Attica”, referencing the rather infamous prison riot of the 70’s having to deal with political rights and better living conditions.

Exactly the moment I was thinking of as I was writing that. So in short, not only am I Charlie Day, but I’m also Rafi. I think I might be a combination of two of the craziest/weirdest/most hilarious characters in all of television.

And this is why we love you.

picklesandwine:

Candy NO!

rafibomb:

Seems about right

rafibomb:

Ashley the Au Pair, being pretty fucking classy.

Ruxin: You know what? I have an idea.
Rafi: Jerk off party?
Ruxin: No.
Rafi: Let's do this.
Ruxin: No.
Rafi: (unbuttoning pants) I like where this is going.
Ruxin: Okay, put it away and just listen to me. What if you took Geoffrey to swim class?
Rafi: Yes! Done! Obviously your kid needs a male role model. 'Cause I'll be honest with you, he's soft. Weak and soft.
Ruxin: 'Cause he's four.
Rafi: 'Cause he's your son.
Ruxin: No.
Rafi: You spend all your time reading books and looking at numbers and letters like they mean something.
Ruxin: They do, do you know how to read?
Rafi: I get by, alright?
Ruxin: What do you know?
Rafi: You know, like red means stop.
Ruxin: Great
Rafi: Green means go.
Ruxin: Good.
Rafi: Yellow's the other one.
Ruxin: Do you want to do this with Geoffrey?
Rafi: Yes! I'm telling you, I really want to.
Ruxin: Okay, then you need to listen to these rules.
Rafi: I'm listening!
Ruxin: RED!
Rafi: (pauses)
Ruxin: Okay. Few rules: no smoking.
Rafi: Cigarettes or drugs?
Ruxin: Both.
Rafi: Oh come on! How long does this class even last?
Ruxin: Like an hour.
Rafi: What?!
Ruxin: Two: no swearing.
Rafi: Oh shit on me.
Ruxin: Three: no knives.
Rafi: What if there's an attack?
Ruxin: It's children and mothers in a pool.
Rafi: That's exactly what I would attack.
Ruxin: And here's the forth, and this is the most important, you need to pretend to be me. And that's our secret so that Sofia doesn't know.
Rafi: Alright.
Ruxin: You're pretending to be Rodney Ruxin.
Rafi: Yeah.
Ruxin: Do we have a deal?
Rafi. Yeah, deal. No wait, do you have a sister?
Ruxin: Yeah.
Rafi: I get to do her.
Ruxin: She lives in Milwaukee, she's married to a dentist, and she's got IBS. So have at her.
Rafi: Oh I will.
defgoingtothegym:

I made this GIF of what I assume is everyone’s secret Jason Mantzoukas sexual fantasy. 

It is totally mine!

defgoingtothegym:

I made this GIF of what I assume is everyone’s secret Jason Mantzoukas sexual fantasy. 

It is totally mine!

rafibomb:

fyeahchrispratt:

Chris Pratt and Jason Mantzoukas at the Grey Goose pre-Oscars party.

#*whispers* ‘we’re building a bridge

rafibomb:

fyeahchrispratt:

Chris Pratt and Jason Mantzoukas at the Grey Goose pre-Oscars party.

zapstraighttoitdotcom:

The first thing that you have to understand about Rafi is that he’s not just horrible. Jason Mantzoukas also imbues him with a bizarre kind of innocence. He honestly believes that the guys on The League are his best friends. His earnest desire to be one of the guys is one of the reasons he so winsome. He’s just trying to fit in guys! But the road to Hell is paved with good intentions, and it’s crystal clear that Rafi already has one foot in the fiery Inferno.
— 

Why Exactly Do We Love Rafi On ‘The League So Much? | Decider

picklesandwine:

unicornery:

picklesandwine:

I think I’m going to follow unicornery's lead and just start calling the characters on The League whatever name Rafi has for them. Brian, Tall Guy, Asian Lady (Jenny) and “our son” for Baby Geoffrey

ah yes, “our son.”

image

The child actor thought Kroll and Mantzoukas were a couple, which is just about the cutest thing I’ve ever heard

That was a handheld, drill-based dildo trident, and last year, we had a dildo trident that was a big, Poseidon-like spear. Dildo tridents are a real central part of the mythology of Rafi and Dirty Randy, apparently.[…] If you think about it, the fact that there are two characters who routinely commit wanton acts of murder, revenge, vigilante justice, possibly-consensual pornography on what is ostensibly a normal sitcom about guys who play fantasy football is pure madness.
Jason Mantzoukas, talking to the Daily Beast. (via twiststreet)